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July 2001

Download the word version, perfect for printing and handing out on street corners!
In this issue:    Ash gets Artificially Intelligated!   God hates Evolution!    Sequels Worth Seeing!   PLUS:    the Passions of Batturtle,    Hamilton goes Straight to Hell,    and Craig Kilborn Must Die!
Evolution ***
X: The Geoff With The X-Ray Eyes

Public Enemy were right. Do not believe the hype. I first heard about this film in grade 4 or 5, though I had probably been aware of it in more general terms since I could read. It seems that one Charles Darwin wrote a theory of Evolution back in the 19th century, a theory that has confounded religious leaders and the thick-headed for decades, and which now has been made into a film. Why religious leaders would have anything particularly bad to say about a film starring David Duchovny and funnyman Orlando Jones is beyond me, but check this out: "Evolution is not admissible without the mediation of a supreme Mind which established the laws of nature governing natural processes and which created nature itself." That's a quote from Father Vittorio Marcozzi, spokespriest for THE POPE! That's some heavy handed criticism, and it seems to suggest that the Vatican had some hand in the crafting of the film. Is Ivan Reitman even Catholic? One would have to assume so. It's not just the Church that's in a huff. American schools can't seem to decide whether teaching Evolution in class is legitimate. Here's some information by Lynne H. Schultz at www.ifidels.org..."Five states (Colorado, Florida, Illinois, Mississippi, and Tennessee), avoid Evolution in their state standards altogether. One of these states, Colorado, has a school district, Poudre, which had banned all teaching of Evolution for a while before it was forced to reverse the ban." But the advance hype coverage isn't all bad. A couple of years back, Pearl Jam released the theme song to the film, "Do the Evolution". They sure made the film seem like it would be rockin'. There are even scientists so excited about the movie that they dedicate themselves to studying Evolution. But how does the movie hold up? I didn't think it was as good as Eddie Vedder would have me believe. And while I hardly think kids today need to study Evolution in school, I do not think it should be condemned or banned. All in all it is a pleasant, often funny comedy, the only real flaw of which is that it is the same movie as Ghostbusters. And Ghostbusters was a good movie. The special effects were good, though not revolutionary. Duchovny is a really good straight man. Orlando Jones is very funny. Julianne Moore, the fancy pants Oscar-caliber actress, clearly phoned in her role. That guy from American Pie…yeah he's okay too. So as long as you are not a die-hard Catholic, or go to school in Illinois, you may well enjoy Evolution. Of course, I'm preaching to the converted with those Pearl Jam fans. Can any of you tell me what was up with Vitology?

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