Top Ten Reasons Why you should elect me supreme leader
June 8, 2004:   By A.L. the Messiah, #191
All contracts need to be signed in blood
I will promote the platypus to god status
It will never be boring
The entire world will be like Viva la Bam
Tacos will be free
Paulie Shore and those who look like him will be put to death
War will be decided by paper-rock-scissors
I will cut off Bush's hands and then use them as a mouse pad
Vampire bats will be made illegal
If I like your pants I have the right to take them from you
Editor's Note: For me, Issue #1 in the upcoming Canadian election is the vampire bats problem.

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Top Ten Reasons Why you should elect me supreme leader
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