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About The Author

Born on a windy October's eve in 1964, the man known as Ash Carreau was originally created as a genetically engineered, super-human science-hero to battle Communists during the Red Scare. Given the code name Voltar, the Electro-Magnetic Man, he was to be Earth's greatest champion, but unfortunately, the lightening bolt ear-marked to jolt his steel and coal body to life passed through a TV antenna broadcasting an episode of the original Star Trek before hitting its intended target, causing some unexpected side effects. Currently, Voltar resides in his underground lair somewhere in the wastes of downtown Static City, feeding his cathode ray addiction with episodes of Mystery Science Theatre 3000 and reruns of Twin Peaks. Occasionally, he ventures out the front door long enough to walk a block to the local Movieland, but the potential risk of exposure to daylight is usually enough to keep him indoors. To hide his unusually long life-span and strange super powers, as well as certain appetites that can only be satisfied via Asian mail order brides and power-tools, Voltar uses a variety of pseudonyms in his day to day existence, the most prominent being Ash Carreau, under which he writes and edits the e-zine PULP.

About the Column

Regular readers of PULP may be familiar with Ash's rather un-orthodox taste in movies. But PULP only scratches the surface. Beneath the bluster, hostility, and uncomfortably deviant political and moral ideology lies a vast untapped reservoir of hatred and borderline sociopathy, all of which can be traced back to his habit of spending 20 hours of any given day watching films with titles like A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell while muttering profanities to himself. Tales From The Crypt, the article, is intended to bring readers into the world of Ash, a world where a 12-hour Buffy The Vampire Slayer marathon is a viable alternative to eating, and nothing is what it seems. Each weekly article is structured as a loose diary of Ash's movie watching habits, so that new readers and old friends can understand him better, and perhaps begin to comprehend why he considers Friday The 13th movies a valid way to spend an afternoon, and why he compulsively refers to himself in the third person.

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