Probably the most average guy in America, Adam hasn't had much to talk
about. After graduating high school in Columbus, Ohio, he then went to
DeVry University for Software Engineering. Unfortunately, college
outsmarted him and he's now living in a box underneith a bypass, pursuing a
career in law enforcement. He owes Dan Haun a lifedebt for the time he saved
Adam from a mob consisting of 3 rabid weasels, 24 albino pigeons, and Bob
Dole. All of his column ideas come to him right after he gets settled into
bed. It's really irritating.