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REVIEW: Liam Lynch: Fake Songs
7.4.2003 by Dan Beirne, every Wednesday.

Nathan Lane comes over every Wednesday to the house to watch a movie, or just chat with Dan. Dan found these little chats so interesting, he decided to tape-record them and tell the world all the neat things Nathan had to say about movies and stuff.

Wednesday, I know I know.

Liam Lynch: Fake Songs (2002): Ever heard that United States of Whatever song? Yeah, it's that guy's album.

(Nathan's dressed up like a british soldier, and there are cats everywhere)

Me: Three words?

Nathan: Get to bed!

Me: About the album.

Nathan: I know.

Me: I thought first we should talk about the--

Nathan: Music, I know. As you know, this piece of art comes both with a full-length LP and a DVD including many of Lynch's various video projects. But, yeah, dinkus, let's start with the cd.

Me: These songs are just silly fluff.

(Nathan takes some rations out of his backpack)

Nathan: Wrong! (his mouth full of granola) While the songs may feel like nothing at first, they are in fact, both nothing and something at the same time.

Me: Could you explain--

Nathan: No. The cd is divided into two parts, each part mixed into the other: the fake songs, and Liam Lynch's actual efforts at music. The fake songs are imitations of the styles of various famous artists like David Bowie, Bjork, and The Pixies, him trying to make songs that both encapsulate the ouevre of the artist, and sound like a song they could've actually recorded.

Me: Ahem..

Nathan: Yes, while they also poke fun at the artist's sound or lyrical patterns. These are the best part of the cd, because they're funny and clever, and also nice to listen to.

Me: May I read some now?

Nathan: Fine. Don't fuck this up.

Me: I wouldn't want to ruin your masterpiece.

(punches me in the arm)

Nathan: Take that!

Me: As far as his solo efforts go, "United States of Whatever" is still far and away his best song, being just plain cool in its over-the-top, there's-a-guitar-in-my-cereal kind of way. The next song that even comes close is "Sir Track", the last song on the album, that pins down how teenage girls act so well, he just knows how to win me over.

Nathan: Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Me: The rest of his solo songs take a turn for the boring, reminding me of when I first listened to the Ben Kweller album....is this as high as it goes?

Nathan: Tell them the part about how you're really dumb.

Me: So, the cd, while not letting me down, just sort of let me.

Nathan: Yeah!

Me: That doesn't make sense.

Nathan: My turn. The DVD was a different story. Having heard about Sifl n Olly, I was excited to see what the Liam Lynch acclaim was all about. He includes not only his crazy videos, but also some video journals he made, during the making of the very DVD I was watching, about his process. Now, if I hadn't seen his process, maybe I would be more impressed with Liam's work, but what he let me see was really just a reflection of myself. I've stayed up all night building crap and filming myself from different angles. And I'll tell you something, usually it turns out to be crap.

(my mom pokes her head through the window)

My mom: It's true!

Nathan: And when you look at this stuff after watching his process, you'd think it would make you appreciate it more, but not for me. I realised this is not a guy cutting corners on purpose to make a shitty video, this is a fairly nerdy dude trying his damndest to make a great video for his audience. It was just so....

Me: Uncomfortable?

Nathan: Depressing.

Me: But doesn't it--

Nathan: I'm getting to that!

Me: ...

Nathan: But that's not to say that my opinion has been entirely dragged down by what I have seen of Mr. Lynch's personality. Just 'cause he's not as cool as I thought, doesn't mean he can't make cool stuff.

Me: So?

Nathan: What?

Me: Your rating?

Nathan: 6.5

Me: Ouch.

Nathan: I had fun, but I just wouldn't put the album on for its own sake.

Me: Recommendations?

Nathan: If you liked this, you might like Tenacious D, The Magnetic Fields: 69 Love Songs, and I Can't Think Of Another.

as always, you can e-mail Nathan to talk about movies, or music, or just chat about whatever.


to all the kids making movies in their basement (myself included): don't use those fake hillbilly teeth anymore. no longer funny. end trasnmission.

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