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The Trial
12.18.2002 by Dan Beirne, every Wednesday.

Nathan Lane comes over every Wednesday to the house to watch a movie, or just chat with Dan. Dan found these little chats so interesting, he decided to tape-record them and tell the world all the neat things Nathan had to say about movies and stuff.

Wednesday, November 6th, cloudy

The Trial (1963) Josef K wakes up in the morning and finds the police in his room. They tell him that he is on trial but nobody tells him what he is accused of. In order to find out about the reason of this accusation and to protest his innocence, he tries to look behind the facade of the judicial system. But since this remains fruitless, there seems to be no chance for him to escape from this Kafkaesque nightmare. Starring Anthony Perkins and directed by Orson Welles.

Nathan: Wait, is that on the back?

Me: Yeah, that's the description.

Nathan: Well, how can it be Kafka-esque if it's an adaptation of a Kafka novel? That's like saying you having a large nose is Dan-esque.

Me: Uh...yeah.

(Nathan's cellular phone rings. it plays a classical music song.)

Nathan: Oh, that's me.

Me: Oh..

Nathan: Hello?

(my phone rings too. but it's not cellular)

Nathan: No, I'm just here now..

Me: Hello?

Nathan: Well, does it matter? I'll be there.

Me: Yes, that's me.

Nathan: I told you, I'm busy Wednesdays. It's just some work stuff I gotta take care of.

Me: Uh, eighteen to twenty-five.

Nathan: Well, why did you make reservations? You know it's like this every week.

Me: Um, I forget.

Nathan: What does that mean, you forgot? How could you forget?

Me: I'd say eight to ten times a week.

Nathan: Well, did you bring a book?

Me: I mostly just browse the headlines.

Nathan: Oh, that reminds me, did you get that book back from your friend?

Me: Um, not really ever.

Nathan: What's her name again, Cynthia?

Me: Nope.

Nathan: That's an odd name: Cynthia. It's so....

Me: I don't really have an income.

Nathan: No, I wasn't thinking trashy, more...

Me: I don't feel comfortable answering that.

Nathan: Incisive.

Me: Well, I apologise, it just feels intrusive.

Nathan: Yeah, like every time I say it it's like cutting a big slice of salami.

Me: Uh, I'm not really familiar with the Bible.

Nathan: Well, order me something, and I'll see you when I see you.

Me: Um, I'm going to hang up now.

Nathan: I don't care, surprise me. Make it something hard to cook, 'cause I'll be a little bit.

(sound of me hanging up the phone. and at the same moment, my dog barked once, really loud. He does that sometimes)

Nathan: Okay, bye.

(Nathan hangs up)

Me: Who was that?

Nathan: Oh, it was a..just a phone survey. Who was that for you?

Me: Um, just a friend of mine. A girl.

Nathan: Oh.

Me: So what did you think of that?

Nathan: Well, you know, it was just a survey, it was okay I guess.

Me: No, the movie.

Nathan: Oh, right. It was spectacular. Like an insane parade of light.

Me: I meant the movie.

Nathan: The ending always sort of confused me. It's such an odd image.

Me: Yeah?

Nathan: Yeah, I mean, it just seems like dynomite was really over-the-top, don't you think?

Me: Yeah, I guess.

Nathan: But apparently the book was a lot more gruesome. Maybe he wasn't allowed to put the actual ending in the movie.

Me: Yeah, maybe.

Nathan: So who's this girl? Do I know her?

Me: No, you don't know her.

(a car horn from the driveway)

Nathan: Man, I'm never ready for her. It sucks.

Me: Yeah.

(opening my door, walking down the hall)

Nathan: Bye, ruffles!

Ruffles: Bye!

As always, you can e-mail Nathan at hakunamattata69@hotmail.com to talk about movies, or just chat about whatever.


The Bible: Boy wonder overcomes adversity and saves the world from the evil. Available at Chapters.ca

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