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12.3.2002 by Dan Beirne, every Wednesday.

Nathan Lane comes over every Wednesday to the house to watch a movie, or just chat with Dan. Dan found these little chats so interesting, he decided to tape-record them and tell the world all the neat things Nathan had to say about movies and stuff.

Wednesday, October 23rd, cloudy

Bully (2001) Based on a true story. Naive teenagers plot to murder one of their own, who has been too much of a bully to them. Stars Brad Renfro, Nick Stahl, and directed by Larry Clark.

(it was lucky I sat on the play and record button of my tape recorder by accident, because Nathan stopped the movie half-way through. The first part is the dialogue from the movie heard on the tape just before Nathan stopped it.)

Marty: Let's do it. Let's fuckin' kill him.

Lisa: Yeah, let's totally fuckin kill him.

Marty: Wait, I don't know if we should kill him.

Lisa: No, we should totally fuckin' kill him.

(Sounds of furious clicking, as Nathan tries to figure out how to stop my computer's DVD player.)

Nathan: There!

Me: Oh...

Nathan: I'm sorry, I just couldn't deal with that anymore. It was driving me insane.

Me: But you turned it off.

Nathan: I know I turned it off, I felt insulted.

Me: Why?

Nathan: Because it was ridiculous, Dan. Absolutely ridiculous.

Me: Oh...

Nathan: Larry Clark always claims to be portraying how it 'really is'. Don't you find that?

Me: Um...

Nathan: Well, if that's how it really is, then I don't care. Those people are despicable.

Me: Well, maybe that's the point.

Nathan: I know it's the point, okay? I get it. Okay? I get it. I just think it's stupid.

Me: I heard the ending was good.

Nathan: Well, then you can watch the ending all you like, eat your hardoubt.

(I was really confused by this.)

Me: Sorry?

Nathan: What?

Me: Eat...my--?

Nathan: Can I open your window? I need some air.

Me: Oh, sure, go ahead.

(Sound of Nathan struggling with the window. Sound of me opening my drawer, finding a pen, and writing down a word to look up later.)

Nathan: It's not opening.

Me: How do you spell that?

Nathan: I think the wood is swelled.

Me: Oh yeah, that's because of the summer.

Nathan: But it's not hot now.

Me: Yeah, but it's not cold either.

Nathan: Uhh, it's too stuffy in here, let's go for a walk.

Me: Okay

(I stopped the tape, and forgot to start it right away when we were walking.)

Nathan: I love the leaves.

Me: Why is their garbage out here again?

Nathan: We have to be back soon, my aunt will be here pretty soon.

Me: Yeah, cool.

Nathan: I just hate Larry Clark so much.

Me: Who?

Nathan: I mean, Kids was absolutely atrocious, and I only wanted to see this one to give him another chance. But man..

Me: I heard the ending was good.

(a car horn from behind us. Nathan looks back.)

Nathan: Is that..--

Me: Watch out--

(Nathan stepped on a porno magazine)

Nathan: Oh, oops.

Me: Well, are you ever going to give him a chance again?

Nathan: I don't know, we'll have to see when his next movie comes out and the critics go mental again.

Me: I think the cover stuck to your shoe.

Nathan: Ah, damn.

(a car horn from behind us. Nathan looks back again.)

Nathan: It WAS her. Dammit. I'll see you.

(sound of Nathan running away.)

As always, you can e-mail Nathan at hakunamattata69@hotmail.com to talk about movies, or just chat about whatever.


Kids (1995) An amoral young skater sets out to deflower as many virgins as possible, but things go badly when one gets tested for HIV. Directed by Larry Clark, and written, in part, by Harmony Korine.

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