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Better Than Flicking Teen Idols' Eyeballs Off Your Fingertips
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Thumbs Up / Down
7.31.2002 by , every Wednesday.
Toronto
 Ahh, Toronto, T.O., The City, T-dot, whatever you want to call it. I just got back from a visit to the "City That Works", and I must say that I do quite like the place, no matter what 20 million non-Torontonians might say. It's loud, busy, hard-working - yet also clean, polite and friendly. The dizzying height of the skyscrapers on Bay Street makes just being there an interesting experience, almost like New York. And the surrealism exhibit at the Art Gallery of Ontario has given me some interesting artistic ideas. I just have to think of a title and caption for this speck of dust I found.
Goldmember
 Hmph. I went to see Goldmember last Sunday and I must say that, all in all, it was a letdown. During the first 15 minutes, I nearly pissed myself laughing, and there were a few other choice bits - but the filler between these relied on overly gross and unfunny bathroom humour, the token black girl using the word "sugar" a lot, and a few recycled old gags - these could have still been funny if they had been delivered cleverly, but they weren't. Oh yeah and Beyoncé Knowles is NOT an actress - I've read numerous reviews which applaud her, and I m still scratching my head. It's starting to bleed.
Franz Kafka - The Trial
OK, so it was tricky at parts, dragged at others, and I'd be lying to you if I said that I 100% "got it" (to the extent that anyone really can). Nevertheless, it was deliciously bleak, cynical, absurd and disturbing - things that I always enjoy in a book. Sure you might finding yourself pulling your hair out tryig to figure out the meaning of details, and you might feel like throwing yourself off a cliff at the end, but it's quite fun for a little game of "name that allegory".
People
So get this. The other day, I step out of my office to head down the street for a cup of coffee. Half-a-block ahead of me, I see a guy sprawled on the ground, apparently after having fallen out of his wheelchair. As I walk toward him, all sorts of people - workers, tourists, families - walk straight past him, pretending not to notice. Only at the last minute, as I get there, does someone offer to help him up. Now, about 20 people walked past, and only TWO of those were willing to offer a simple "are you OK?". Using these numbers, one can derive that 90% of people are scum. This is shocking, because it is a good 5% off my previous, more optimistic estimate of 85%. Of course there is the issue of small-sample statistical deviation, so I will have to do more research in order to find a more precise number on which to base my curmudgeonliness.
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