Security - The Other Side
May 24, 2003

RANT #189: Misc.
Some Girl
Summary: Why you should be nice to your local security people when we're nice to you.
Questionable Content This rant contains profanity or other offensive material.
Full Text:

I occasionally wonder at some peoples inability to have any sort of logical thought process. Its like they deliberately TRY not to think about things from a sensible point of view.

So I work in security at the metal detectors at a local amusement park. We are constantly taking pocket knives from people as they try to bring them into the park merely because if we take one knife from one person, we have to take them all, and some people are trying to bring some seriously inappropriate knives into the park. Obviously we arent allowed to profile, and wouldnt anyways, so even if its a 13 year old girl or a 35 year old man, if theres a knife involved, we have to either check it, toss it, or tell the person to take it back to their car. This doesnt occur to some people  obviously, since THEY know they arent a criminal, WE are supposed to know they arent a criminal either, just based on the fact that they look like a respectable middle-aged man instead of a hardened gangster or what have you. So naturally we get bitched at for taking peoples terrorist pocket knives and searching through bags while people are muttering about leaving the bomb in their other purse(trust me, that joke gets funnier every time I hear it hear me laughing?).

And of course anyone who walks into the park, leaves temporarily, and returns couldnt POSSIBLY have put anything in their pockets while they were gone that would warrant them going through the metal detectors on their way back in. If I were a criminal, thatd be the first thing Id try. Oh, I went through already, okay? What, I have to go through again? Thats BS. Screw that. If you went back to your car, you couldve damn well strapped a machete or two to your leg for all I know. And yes, thats actually happened.

Then we have the folks who wear the obscene T-Shirts to the park. Freedom of speech is a beautiful thing, until youre teaching young kids just learning how to read to curse. Amusement parks are family attractions. If youre going to wear a shirt that explains just how much of an asshole you are, do it somewhere else, lest people start taking the shirt seriously. Beyond that, profanity laws DO exist in America(Im not sure what they are in Canada) to the point where if *Im* offended, youre breaking the law. So there. Im telling my mom on you.

Oh. If I have another person grab my metal detecting wand and say Can I wave your wand? in a perverted manner, or even a non-perverted manner, I will do something that my contract says Im not allowed to say Ill do.

People may say were infringing upon their rights or that what were doing isnt necessary. Well, they have a right not to enter the park. Other people also have a right to safety, which has obviously been infringed upon if people are bringing in switchblades, machetes, hatchets, or whatever else they think they can get away with. I personally wouldnt bring a 5 year old kid to a park if I knew half the stuff Ive seen in peoples pockets was floating around out there.

Anyhow, I guess my main point is here that before people get pissy about increased security in various places, take into account that psychos exist, the reasons we have to check everybody and not just some certain specific types of people, and the fact that were at this job to try and make things safer for everybody, not just for the sole purpose of inconveniencing one person. Oh, and security guards are people too.

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