Karma Strawberries!
April 8, 2004

RANT #239: Misc.
Madeleine
 
Summary: Things  that are contributing to the slow but certain deterioration of my mental health.
 
Questionable Content This rant contains profanity or other offensive material.
 
Full Text:

 
The world has gone completely topsy turvy.
Theyve put me away in a nutshell (literally).
Who is to blame for this proposterous predicament?

1) George Bush: As head idiot of the free world, he has caused me a tremendous amount of worry and work. Let me cite you a few examples.

I have had to explain to 15 year old boys that contrary to the Bush adminisrations true love waits campaign,  natural planning is not the most effective and only neccessary means of birth control, condoms are important.

I have had to correct my grandmother when she refers to packis as opposed to the politically correct term packistanis, her excuse, Welll Bush said just this morning.. aargh.....

2) Nickelback: Theyre horrible... and theyre everywhere! If I have to hear about how I remind him or about how he grew up in the ghetto of Saskatoon one more time... Ill turn into an oompa loompa and live the rest of my days in a leper colony off the coast of Madagascar, happy and orange.

3)  Thai food: Whatever bastard wrote the 6 page article about how fish sauce ( the main flavouring ingredient in thai food) is made, using extracted juices from the liver of small fish and fermenting with lots of salt.... blah..blah....gag. Youve ruined Phad Thai with extra tofu for me forever, and I hate you!!!

4)  Beer: It makes you fat.....who knew?

5)   The good looking boy on the subway with the head phones, and the skate board, and the hardcover copy of Dorian Gray: Why are you so hopelessly self-involved?

6)  THE MAN ON THE SUBWAY WHO WAS SITTING NEXT TO ME AND BREATHING LIKE ELRON HUBBARD AT AN I.R.S. CONVENTION, AND PROCEEDED TO REMOVE HIS SHOES AND SOCKS AND CLIP HIS TOENAILS, AND DROP HIS DIRTY TOENAIL BITS ON MY PURSE. HIS EXPLANTION,  IM GOING TO GO GET FUCKED, CANT HAVE LONG TOENAILS. I have yet to recover.

7) Subways in general.
 


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