Dispel the Pixels!
November 27, 2000

RANT #22: Computers & Internet
JP
 
Summary: No more distorted images! Are they pimples, poor lighting? No! Death to the pixels!
 
Full Text:

 
The words you are reading right now are made up of thousands of tiny square picture elements or 'pixels'. Back in the day pixels were quite prominent in a digital landscape populated by hell- hounds and red-hatted plumbers. Thanks to recent advances in technology these "jagged bastards" have been shrunk to an invisible size giving us graphics and photos smoother than those diaper-ad baby asses we're constantly being assaulted with on TV. But that's another rant.The words you are reading right now are made up of thousands of tiny square picture elements or 'pixels'. Back in the day pixels were quite prominent in a digital landscape populated by hell-hounds and red-hatted plumbers. Thanks to recent advances in technology these "jagged bastards" have been shrunk to an invisible size giving us graphics and photos smoother than those diaper-ad baby asses we're constantly being assaulted with on TV. But that's another rant.The words you are reading right now are made up of thousands of tiny square picture elements or 'pixels'. Back in the day pixels were quite prominent in a digital landscape populated by hell-hounds and red-hatted plumbers. Thanks to recent advances in technology these "jagged bastards" have been shrunk to an invisible size giving us graphics and photos smoother than those diaper-ad baby asses we're constantly being assaulted with on TV. But that's another rant.
Nowhere are these baby-ass-smooth graphics more widely available than on the web, a virtual cornucopia of photos, and not just naughty ones. Newspapers, magazines and television have seized this opportunity to acquire images from the web whenever they need any sort of stock photo or company logo. The problem is that most of these images are just high enough in resolution to look good in their original size. Many of the people acquiring these images for print do not understand this. They are used to good old high-resolution analog (real) photos that can be enlarged to their heart's content.

If you publish a pamphlet, a newsletter, a magazine, newspaper, anything. And if you let a pixelated photograph slip onto the page then you may as well replace it with a nice crisp little bit of text that reads "I'm a freaking moron and I'd really love it if someone kicked my ass". Not that I condone the use of violence against anyone.. But we're talking about PIXELS here! All bets are off.

Finally I'd like to address those of you who are thinking "Hey! Although you're much smarter and better looking than myself, I've noticed that there are quite a few pixelated images on this very website!". There is a perfectly good explanation for this, it's intentional. There's a big difference between artistic expression and being a freaking moron who wants to get his ass kicked.
 


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